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Thread: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

  1. #1
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    Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.


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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    'Kidding' that's funny - or not, WRONG on so many levels, the boy needs help, SERIOUS help!!

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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    "having sex with a living animal contrary to the Sexual Offences Act 2003."

    That's the nanny state for you.

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    Senior Member Huffy's Avatar
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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    What a silly billy!!

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    Senior Member wellington53's Avatar
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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    That guy is completely fu**ed up.

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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    Quote Originally Posted by matbrojoe View Post
    "having sex with a living animal contrary to the Sexual Offences Act 2003."

    That's the nanny state for you.
    So is it OK if the animal's dead?

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    Senior Member daven's Avatar
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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    And here I was thinkin y'all liked sheep......

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    Be your self and speak your mind. Them that matter won't mind and the others don't matter

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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    Quote Originally Posted by daven View Post
    And here I was thinkin y'all liked sheep......

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    Only west of a certain border.

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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    What happens if the goats go to him?

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    Senior Member Bald Rick's Avatar
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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    Quote Originally Posted by matbrojoe View Post
    "having sex with a living animal contrary to the Sexual Offences Act 2003."
    I thought humans are animals too? Mind you the operative word is "Living" which lets a lot of us off I suspect

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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    Never happened to Denzil in the Jethro sketch, he didn't get banned, but I suppose he was Cornish.

    penntor

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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    Reminds me of the joke....

    A man goes into a pub in a small town and, for whatever reason, gets introduced to the clientele. There’s Farmer Jack, Barman Jim, Maurice “Dancer” and Sheepshagger John. After a few pints, the visitor’s curiosity gets the better of him and he asks John what’s with the nickname.
    “See this pub?” asks John, "I built it, but they don’t call me Pubbuilder John? I’m the local doctor, I saved Barman Jim’s life once when he choked on a peanut, but they don’t call me Lifesaver John. Every year, I supply a huge Christmas tree for the village green, but the don’t call me Christmas Tree John.
    “But you shag one lousy sheep…”

  13. #13
    Senior Member daven's Avatar
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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    Quote Originally Posted by Einstien View Post
    Reminds me of the joke....

    A man goes into a pub in a small town and, for whatever reason, gets introduced to the clientele. There’s Farmer Jack, Barman Jim, Maurice “Dancer” and Sheepshagger John. After a few pints, the visitor’s curiosity gets the better of him and he asks John what’s with the nickname.
    “See this pub?” asks John, "I built it, but they don’t call me Pubbuilder John? I’m the local doctor, I saved Barman Jim’s life once when he choked on a peanut, but they don’t call me Lifesaver John. Every year, I supply a huge Christmas tree for the village green, but the don’t call me Christmas Tree John.
    “But you shag one lousy sheep…”

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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    Sheep not good enough for you English now?

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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    Quote Originally Posted by Cardi View Post
    Sheep not good enough for you English now?
    No, clearly we'll have to improve our flocks or the English tourist trade will start going overseas. I'm told the New Zealanders are years ahead of us in breeding for the correct traits.

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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    Quote Originally Posted by NeilO View Post
    So is it OK if the animal's dead?
    Presumably.No "worse" than many other deviant activities.

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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    There was a guy in this part of the world who was done for various sexual offences on one farm where he would go and stand in their slurry lagoon and excite himself, there are some truly depraved people around.

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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    Yes Neil, its fine if the animal's dead, don't worry about it!

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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    If you are into Sadism , Necrophilia and Beastiality ...............









    ........Are you flogging a dead horse ?
    loose does not rhyme with choose but lose does and is the word you meant to write

  20. #20
    Senior Member wr.'s Avatar
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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    Funnily enough, I was reading in our local paper only last night about a chap who was up infront of the magistrates last week for potching with a sheep.
    When sentencing, the chair of the bench told him, "Ewe've been a Baad Baad boy and ewe mutton do it again."
    Don't itch for something if you're not prepared to scratch for it.

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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    Quote Originally Posted by jerseycowsman View Post
    There was a guy in this part of the world who was done for various sexual offences on one farm where he would go and stand in their slurry lagoon and excite himself, there are some truly depraved people around.
    It's a case of different strokes for different folks, i suppose.

  22. #22
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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    He was just acting the goat !.

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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    Quote Originally Posted by crosshair View Post
    He was just acting the goat !.

    Just as well he wasn't horsing around
    loose does not rhyme with choose but lose does and is the word you meant to write

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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    It's the nanny state gone mad ......
    loose does not rhyme with choose but lose does and is the word you meant to write

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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    It's all the grooming that worries me...

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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    How did he get caught? Did the goat complain? Does the chap work for the BBC?

    An old chap who worked for me part time, he died recently aged 97, told me that he worked with a man during the war who reckoned that the nearest thing to a woman was a pig!!!

  27. #27
    Senior Member Richard_W's Avatar
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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    Quote Originally Posted by NewQman View Post
    How did he get caught? Did the goat complain? Does the chap work for the BBC?
    Probably the goat grassed him to the pigs when he said her sister was a better ride

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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    Quote Originally Posted by NewQman View Post
    How did he get caught? Did the goat complain? Does the chap work for the BBC?

    An old chap who worked for me part time, he died recently aged 97, told me that he worked with a man during the war who reckoned that the nearest thing to a woman was a pig!!!


    A chap worked on a farm next door to us . He was nicknamed Jack the muck man , what he did was run around with a tractor and trailer moving muck from the chicken sheds and pig unit onto concrete pads ready to spread on the arable .
    The reason he was on muck duties was that previously he had worked in the farrowing shed and had been caught f888ing a sow .

    Apparently , if you saw his wife you'd understand why !!
    loose does not rhyme with choose but lose does and is the word you meant to write

  29. #29
    Senior Member Spotty Dog's Avatar
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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    An old chap who worked for me part time, he died recently aged 97, told me that he worked with a man during the war who reckoned that the nearest thing to a woman was a pig!!![/QUOTE]


    Like we all need to know that

  30. #30
    Member Dman's Avatar
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    Re: Man banned from every farm in the UK after having sex with goat.

    Guy round here a couple of years back was caught with his todger in a donkeys mouth
    The donkey took off and dragged him round the paddock by his Dick

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